He’s really doing well…at least compared to last season. Let’s talk about the WINNERS of the evening! Like, Tyrion is in suuuuuch a good place right now.
That, and she’s sworn herself to every family in Westeros at this point.ĭrew: Okay, this is bumming me out. Not because she’s a woman, but because she’s terrible about prioritizing. And this is why Brienne can’t be a knight. Not even a “heat of the moment, got to go avenge Renly’s murder!” thing. Womp Womp.ĭrew: Brienne, taking a little detour in her last pledge to protect Sansa to go kill the guy who killed the second-to-last person she promised to protect. Vinnie: Then, then, then Stannis’ army engaged Ramsay’s in the “Battle of the We Spent Our Budget on the Dragons.” Which is fine, whatever, not every battle can be Hardhome ( imagine if it was, though?) But then Brienne, who we learn has actually been spending every second looking for that candle and then MISSES IT WHEN SANSA FINALLY LIGHTS IT, just happens to come upon the one dude she’s looking for in the woods and…kills him.
First, they zip through Mutiny – Dead Wife – Red Witch Desertion in a quick series of closeups on Stannis making increasingly bemused “oh, brother” faces.ĭrew: Vinnie, can you please find a screencap of that as well? Thank you SO MUCH, you are basically my Dothrakian army! And by that I mean my savior and/or viral marketing for the next season of True Detective time spirals! (June 22nd, y’all!) Vinnie: Honestly, everything about Stannis’ fate was totally…anticlimactic. Boy, it turns out those bragging rights have soured very quickly.) (I mean, obviously, Mance Rayder from A Song of Fire and Ice, not from the show. Like, if the end is just him nobling dying by Brienne’s hand, what was the POINT? I couldn’t believe he ACTUALLY killed Shireen and wasn’t Mance Rayder’d.
No, I do not buy this Bizarro Stannis storyline at all. Just for those keeping count at home, Stannis has put his entire branch of the family tree out of commission…which…at least…actually, no. Vinnie: Writing my script set in an alternate universe where the Night’s Watch are Tech Bloggers, and they say “For the Apple Watch” as they each stab Jon Snow.ĭrew: So! This was a fun one! Everyone who deserved to gets to lead a long and happy life, and the wicked are punished thoroughly and has to do endure either a walk of shame and/or the most murder-y fraternity hazing in human history.